Sunday, February 26, 2012

Still At It

I am still working on the sad bastard scarf. I wont let myself start another project until it's done. By that time it'll be too hot to wear the damn thing. I guess it will go in the giant bag with everything else.
I am trying to enjoy the mechanics of it- cabling, watching the progress, nice even stitches...but I am not the most patient person in the world so it's kind of a hassle. I can do this! I know I can!
Also, I have been entirely smoke free for six days...before that I slipped a few times, but even though this has been a stressful week I haven't slipped- not even at work. And that's where it's hardest. I hope I can stay strong. It sucks. I am past the itchy annoying feeling of needing a cigarette, and feeling crabby about it finally. I hate that de-tox part. You'd think I'd finally wake up and quit doing this to myself....what a head trip any addiction is. I love it, hate it, wish I'd never started it. I am certain I can quit this time- just have to keep not buying them and staying away from hazardous areas.
I CAN do this. I know I can.

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